A New “Normal”

Since the pseudoexacerbation earlier this month, I have recovered as much as I am able; spending time in the swimming pool has increased my energy and mobility beyond that, even. I have a slight betterment in my mobility and a substantial increase in energy. I am hoping to start my new job with this deriving my general outlook, and I am writing this in public so that when times become bad again (knowing that they will does not scare me like it once did) I have evidence of my own, dare I say, optimism.

When I feel “normal,” it is generally still the pits. “Normal” for me (or “Baseline,” if you want to be mo’ proper) is what I imagine any healthy woman in her sixties feels like: just the minor generalities of physical decline, adding a dash of constant dizziness that will range anywhere from 1-6 on a scale of 1-10. I am taking stock of changes I’ve been able to make since the beginning of this month so as to discover some perceived key to this that I want to make my new “Normal” — swimming tops the list of contenders, with “proper hydration,” “fish oil,” and “rebirth of hope” following it closely.

That “rebirth of hope” thing happens every time I resurface and finish gasping for air from a bad spell; I know to look forward to air again while these things — unflappable dizziness, debilitating fatigue, or any of the other million possibilities for handicap — are happening.

So instead of continuing to talk about how excited I am to have a new “Normal,” I am going to put on my bathing suit and ensure I do what I can to continue it.

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