I am getting to do a lot of things for my health and to better my life right now. It’s a house-cleaning of sorts with previously unanticipated and unknown benefits that offer a safe outlet for the increasing tide of the unanticipated challenges one faces.

I went to a chiropractor for the first time yesterday after a lifetime of being dependent on only medical care that goes incompletely or incorrectly. This morning was the first time I have not woken in pain since the motor vehicle accident.

There is someone in my life now who wants to join me on the journey of living healthfully and well; I, too, on hers. I am unafraid, now, to take into account the things that either I or my many, various doctors couldn’t explain. Residual car-accident back pain is something I know is there, and it is something causing me daily pain. Doctors have seen nothing on MRIs, and I could just go about believing they’re right. It’s been my standard reaction to shrug when they can’t find things. It’s been a lifelong norm.

But this time I am in pain I cannot ignore, and which impinges both my waking and sleeping. No.

I’m not accepting it now. I am done sitting idly by my body as though this suffering was my very singular birthright. How shallow is that? Life is suffering. I have the power to address the forms of it I can. I have an obligation to myself and to my loved ones to live well, as you all have to your loved ones (don’t forget that). I’ve gotten to barter design work for a health coach, and I’m ingesting and processing new ways to look at food and the life around me.

I am learning how not to discuss my new lifestyle choices with others so that I get fewer negative or passive-aggressive reactions. I don’t have time to handle the perceptions, misconceptions and fear of others; I have only time enough to live with love.

And, of course, being a total badass gangsta.

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